Wednesday, July 14, 2010

From his point of view: Decision vs Indecision


"Does this dress look good on me?" The question every man dreads... you know you're in trouble whatever answer you manage to blurt out.

“Yes baby, you couldn't look bad in this dress even if you tried.”

Every reasonable (but inexperienced) man would think he has come up with the perfect answer that would get them out the door and on time for their dinner reservations. But no... this is just the beginning of the much rehearsed, and always nerve-wracking, dialog that is awaiting!

“I’m not sure… something just doesn’t look right”, comes the reply, as if you hadn't spoken at all!
“I need to change...”
This is where you take your jacket off and turn on the TV... and the interrogation begins!
“Do my shoes go with my purse?”, “Yes”
“Does my purse go with my earrings?”, “Yes...”
“Which earrings do you prefer? These ones or those ones?”, “These ones”
“Are you sure? Those ones are...”, “OK, those ones then!”
“Why? Don't you like these ones? I just bought them...”, “Of course I do”
“Which ones then?”, ”These ones, can we finally go please, the taxi's waiting...”
“OK, just a minute, I need to change my hair to go with these earrings!”, “Your hair's fine...”

(sound of hair-blower in the background)

(sound of punch in the wall in the foreground)

Now, there are two parallel but completely different stories in this, all but unfamiliar, scene. One of decisiveness (jeans, shirt, jacket) and simplicity or lack of personal style one might say(?), and one of complete and utter indecisiveness (250 different combinations of shoes, dresses, earrings, bags and hair styles) in which no matter what we are forced to say, most combinations look equally great to us... because it's YOU! All that really matters is not having to go through this scene! Trust me!

Now, for my own sake and personal safety I should clarify that none of the above is based on a true story, all dialogs are completely fictional and any references to reality will be fiercely denied. In summary, I would like to state that men are not capable of making a single right decision when it comes to women's outfits and our own ability to pick our clothes through a split second decision is solely based on our lack of imagination and unlimited supply of freshly washed and ironed shirts, jeans and t-shirts, which of course is the result of your hard work and talent in keeping it out of the laundry bin on a daily basis, for which we of course thank you enormously (as we would be living in “student” conditions otherwise).

But seriously, please... next time... pick your outfit a couple of hours in advance!

3 comments:

  1. haha! love your writing thetis.

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  2. Well, it seems to me you 've got 'his point of view'really right...
    As for the fact that 'all dialogs are completely fictional and any references to reality will be fiercely denied' ...I do have my doubts... hahaha

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  3. Alexis Milanos can certainly make a right decision when it comes to my outfits!!!!

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